Regrets, I have plenty.
Mistakes, I have made many.
I was never the father to our children that I could have been.
Across many years and in many ways, I have not always been the husband I could have been.
I could have been a better student.
I could have been a better baseball player.
I could have been a better employee, a better son, and a better brother.
I could have been a better friend to more people than I have been.
In all of the arenas of my life, I could have been better in all of my endeavors.
Yes, I have made many mistakes; and yes, I have many regrets---and more of both than I care to remember.
I am guilty of being wrong more times than I have been right.
I am guilty of making more bad decisions than good decisions.
For in all the many times and in all of the many ways, I am actually ashamed of my behavior across my lifetime.
I am ashamed for making stupid and selfish decisions.
I am ashamed for wanting my way instead of giving more consideration to the ways of others.
I am ashamed for mistreating others along the trail of my life.
I am ashamed for wanting to speak more than when I should have listened.
I am ashamed for not being more caring, more understanding, and more loving to other people.
I regret for not trying more in all of my endeavors to be my best.
Perhaps we will never know just how good could we could have been had we tried just a little bit harder, or for our failures to recognize the tables that were set before us.
Life is a schoolhouse and it has taken me decades to finally see and to admit the truth about myself, to admit my mistakes, and to acknowledge my regrets.
Greatest of all, I regret not knowing more about God when I was younger, not knowing more about Christ when I was younger, and not becoming a student of the Bible when I was younger. For now I know the purpose of this life is a preparation for life that is yet to come.
Knowing this, then perhaps my latter years will be my best of years.
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